Retreat at Greenhaugh Gardens | A Poem by Phoebe Mackay
Retreat at Greenhaugh Gardens
A poem by Phoebe Mackay, 2021
God the gardener
cultivate my garden heart
plant seeds of hope in springtime beds
and let them open to fragrant life
Deeper still dig down beneath the earth
lifting stones, removing weeds
making room for roots to breathe
God the gardener
walk around this garden heart
its twisting paths, its tangled hollows
Here a rose with apricot colour
Wisteria waving it's dusky scent
There a patch of last year's growth
ready to prune and compost the dead
Those shady parts all overgrown
You'll know when we're to venture in
You'll smile and gently say "It's time"
you'll take my hand as we begin
God my gardener
this your home
plant seeds of life and let them bloom
Written at Greenhaugh Gardens, 2021
Phoebe Mackay is a spiritual director and Community Life Co-ordinator, helping to nourish prayer and spiritual growth in her community of faith. To celebrate the release of the 2023 SGM Retreat Calendar, Kathryn Overall invited Phoebe to share this poem and to reflect on the value that contemplative retreats have offered in nourishing her own spiritual life.
Phoebe, what could you share about the retreat that inspired this beautiful poem?
This poem was written while I was on a retreat day at Greenhaugh Gardens, a beautiful historic homestead near Palmerston North. About 20 of us met together for prayer and a brief reflection and then the rest of time was ours to wander the gardens with God as we liked. There are mature trees, rose gardens, ponds and fountains, wisteria covered walkways, shady paths and flowers everywhere. As I walked and let God draw me to different parts of the garden, I spent time reflecting on the Spirit’s loving work in my own heart which led me to write the poem.
How would you describe what a contemplative retreat is?
A contemplative retreat is space and time to come aside from the busyness of daily life, to slow the pace and listen for what God, and our own hearts, want to say to us. A directed retreat is the best way to start because it provides some scaffolding and a bit of structure. There’s usually morning and evening prayer, resources with scriptures, prayers and questions to guide your quiet time, and you meet with a spiritual director daily which is incredibly helpful for processing and deepening what God is doing in you over the retreat. Mostly, the space is your own to walk, read, journal, pray, sleep!
What value have retreats had in your spiritual journey?
Retreats have been really valuable experiences for me. Life can get busy and stressful so coming aside allows for some rest and restoration for my body, mind and soul. They have given space to allow God to speak to me, usually through spending time in nature, and for some of the deeper soul-stuff to come out and be tended by God’s love. They have taught me a lot about how much I rely on ‘doing’ for self-worth. Henri Nowen puts it this way:
‘It is in solitude that we discover that being is more important than having and that we are worth more than the results of our efforts. In solitude we discover that our life is not a possession to be defended but a gift to be shared.’
As a spiritual director, what words of wisdom might you offer to those considering attending a retreat, perhaps for the first time?
The first time is not easy! Slowing down and detoxing from busyness and noise can be uncomfortable, but my advice is to hang in there! It’s like a pool of water that’s all stirred up and full of swirling sediment and debris. Over time, the debris sinks slowly to the bottom and the water becomes clearer. My experience is that God is very gracious to us. When we put aside time to be with him, he will meet us.
